Monday, February 9, 2004

20/20

I hate wearing glasses.  At this point in my life it's just one more thing that I put down and then can't find later when I need them.  Unfortunately, I can't read a thing without them.  Like menus.  If I couldn't tell that I was holding it upside down, does the waiter think that turning it around for me will make a difference?  Since I can't wear my glasses in the shower how am supposed to tell the difference between the shampoo and the conditioner?  The more powerful and expensive an anti-wrinkle cream is, the smaller the tube is that it comes in.  Who do they think will be straining to read that microscopic print?  Price tags.  While shopping the other day I could have sworn that the price tag said $12.50.  The cashier rang it up as $125.00.  Those decimal points are so damn tiny.  The thermostat.  I gave up trying to see the numbers on the display.  The heat in our house is usually somewhere between sweaty and chattering teeth.  Remote Controls for TV.  Most of the time I just push any old button and watch whatever brings up a picture.  If I accidentally hit the 'off' button, I can always sign onto the computer.  Microwaves.  If you want me to heat it up for you, be happy with barely warm unless you like liquid molten lava.  Watches.  If you ask me what time it is, the best I can do is hold out my arm so YOU can look at it.  I also noticed that they stopped making seconds hands recently.  Caller ID.  What good is it?  Unless one of us is wearing our glasses when the phone rings, we have no idea who's calling.  Cell phones.  I have all my most frequently dialed and important phone numbers programmed into mine.  But half the calls I make are to the wrong people.  I can't tell the difference between their name and the person I really wanted to talk to.  No big deal though.  By the time we hang up I probably won't remember who I wanted to call in the first place.

9 comments:

gbgoglo said...

LOL! God love you! You're sucha delight. I love your humor so much. Thank you! From my heart to yours...Gloria, Kevin's mom

alphawoman1 said...

Gosh, we have the same life!
Mary

readmereadyou said...

Yes, this is bad and true. LOL! I'm getting worse. I even graduated to a magnifying glass to read labels on medications. ::::::sigh:::::::: LOL!

godsistah said...

You are sooooo funny. Keep up the good work!

redhdka said...

You are so funny Lisa...but I think Glasses make people look sexy, it's something more to take off.

lotzamoe said...

I wear glasses. Who said that was sexy?

bridgetteleigh75 said...

I'm only 28 and I still need my contacts/glasses. Trust me, it's not always age-related...it's those damn genetics that get ya!!! Have you tried contacts before?

XO ~ Bridgett

grodygeek said...

Contacts baby contacts. Been wearing them for like a ridulous amount of time, 20+ years. It is the only way to go, and they can help your eyes not get worse as fast. Gordy

bbeckyl said...

** Me to hate wearing glasses..... what a drag in the shower not knowing which is which (shampoo or condit) after being there done that I make sure I buy the shampoo in larger bottle, then I remember which to grab lol...It's just life. Becky>>bbeckyl/HeartSoul