Sunday, March 14, 2004

I really did it this time...

In one month Ray and I are going to Punta Cana.  Normally I love warm and sunny days on the beach under a palm tree where every activity can be done wearing a bathing suit.  But since I have gained at LEAST 20 pounds since I quit smoking 7 months ago, that thought is causing me a lot of anxiety right now.  My winter clothes have afforded me the temporary security of hiding most of the weight.  I'm sitting on 10 new pounds, and the other 10 are resting peacefully on my lap as I sit here typing.  But in one month the only camouflage I will have is my wrap around bikini cover up.  I don't know what I'm going to do.  I not only look AWFUL but I don't feel very good either.  I have to get some blood work done but I can't even go 8 hours without eating chocolate.  I am out of control.  I was a wild woman while Ray was in Spain last week and I had to get rid of all the incriminating evidence before he got back.  I had been happily dining on Entenmann's, Tastykakes, Dunkin' Donuts, and Easter candy from Rite Aid (they have an entire aisle of Easter candy... quite an assortment... I highly recommend it).  My house was a carbohydrate crime scene.  Empty wrappers were strewn all over the floor around the computer.  There were chocolate fingerprints and cookie crumb trails.  I can only imagine what I would have done if I hadn't been sick half of the week.  I probably would have jogged over to Friendly's Ice Cream store.  A couple of times.  No... I'm exaggerating.  I would have driven over.  I haven't jogged in years.  My wicked ways have caught up with me and now I am frantically seeking a solution.  I need to be placed in a temporary, purposely induced coma for a month, and fed only Atkins low carb shakes through a tube.  Ray should CHAIN me to the Bowflex.  Worst of all... as I sit here debating what diet I should start tomorrow, I can't help but think I still have the rest of today to eat a few more Lorna Doones...

8 comments:

redhdka said...

LOL LISA......I DO THAT TOO...I SAY, "OH I'LL START THAT DIET TOMORROW..JUST LET ME EAT THIS BAG OF POPCORN TODAY FIRST." lol TOO FUNNY! WE ALL GO THROUGH THIS IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER..YOU'RE HONESTY AND HUMOR I ADMIRE AND APPRECIATE. ((((Lisa)))

adlessor said...

LOL So while the cat is away, the mouse gets to play!!! You were jusst sooo depressed missing your honey that you were feeling bad and the only thing that worked was chocolate, cookies, ice cream and what, oh ya Lorna Doones. I'v been down that road before.
Thanks for visiting my journal. Come back soon. Dawn

readmereadyou said...

You crack me up. I could relate to all of your food wants. LOL!
But one of the really good things about being single is that you can be fat 12 months of the year. I don't know if at this stage in my life I'd pick a man over chocolate and all of my other carbs to look good for in a bathing suit. LOL. See, I've decided if I ever fall in love, the man must be chubby so I'll always look thin. : )

derasta said...

You are so funny i'm laughing like crazy at my computer, my family thinks I went nuts! I so love your journal!!!

punky5678 said...

Been there! I would highly reccomend THE SOUTH BEACH DIET. I am not sure if it the food you eat or the fact that you are cooking and cleaning up the mess for 24/7 that makes you loose weight, but whatever it is It really works. I lost 20 lbs on it.

iwaterbeari said...

I'm thankin' my lucky stars that I hate chocolate right now! But don't let that fool ya ... you can still gain weight eatin' all that white stuff (doughnuts, bread, potatoes, rice). I always gain weight in the winter, but luckily between the stresses of life and eating only vegetables for the past two weeks, I've shed my winter coat! And I know you can do it too!!!!

andreakingme said...

Lisa! You've got to be STRONG, woman. Gotta keep that GOAL in your head.

But I'll tell you honestly that I absolutely cannot diet until I start working out and I can see and feel a change. Then (and only then) do I have the power to say no to chocolate, bread and pasta.

My advice for you now is to start with baby steps. So ... step AWAY from the Lorna Doones. I know you can do it. Step AWAY!

somenuttychic said...

All I will say about this is:

YOU'RE MY KINDA WOMAN! WOOOOHOOO! (I'm a snack-0-holic, too.) When you're ready, you'll shed those pounds. Until then, don't sweat it. Hey, I haven't donned a bikini since I was 12. If you're 48 and can *still* wear one -- good for you!