I NEED YOUR VOTE!
The voting polls will be closing at 12 midnight tonight!
There's not much time and the race is really close!
Get out there and vote, America!
Normally... I'd go on to say that my fellow candidates
are extremely talented and more than deserving
of their nominations. I'd probably suggest that you
take the time to check out their Journals,
as they are all exceptional in their own way.
Depending on my hormonal influx at the moment,
I may even tell you to hold your vote
until you had the opportunity tobrowse through
the other Journals... and then vote
for the one you felt was best.
But time is short,
so I'm not gonna do that!
Just vote for me!
It only takes a minute!
(I can say that cause I'm not up for the Good Grammar Award!)
A vote for me is a vote for America!
For your mother! Your sister!
Your best girl friend!
The nurse that gave you pain meds!
I represent all the middle-aged women
who can't afford cosmetic surgery!
All the women who rarely have a good hair day!
All the people who have phobias! All the divorced women!
All the Empty Nesters that miss their kids terribly,
but light a candle in church every week
praying that they don't come back!
All the kids who had their hands whacked with a ruler
by their Catholic School Nuns. All the chocoholics in the world!
All the people who need to lose weight! All the women over 40
who wonder if they'll ever get married again!
All the people whose spouses are pack rats!
All the mothers whose daughters exclusively date losers!
All the people who were royally ripped off at the car dealership.
All the people with pacemakers! All the cat lovers!
All the Parrot Heads!
All the people who have had to battle city hall
for a construction permit!
All the people with slipped discs!
All the people who work midnights!
All the people who love Christmas decorations!
(even the cheap and gaudy ones)
All the people who can't read html!
All the people who live in a dwelling
that should be burnt to the ground.
All the people who live in New Jersey!
All the people with leaky basements!
All the people with high cholesterol!
All the people who have had sun poisoning this summer!
All the people who can't ski!
All the people who hate going to the dentist!
And all the people who didn’t fall into any
of the aforementioned categories!
VOTE THE OCCUPANT
Do it cause you know it's the right thing to do.