The Gates Of Hell... Wipe Your Feet First!

Sometimes I think that this house is fighting me every step of the way.  Maybe it knew that I didn't really like it when I first saw it, and even though I am beginning to love it now, it just can't forgive me.  Maybe it liked Ray's ex-wife better than me.  Or maybe... it was built over the entrance to hell itself.  And every evil, miserable and hopeless soul on their way to meet the devil has to walk through my front door first.  The porch collapsed, the pipes burst, the living room was flooded, the plumbing under the kitchen sink rotted through destroying the flooring of the room beneath it, the motor to the garbage disposal burnt out, the dishwasher valves cracked and today the sump pump broke in half cause it was rusty.  Our neighbors tree roots are lifting up the driveway out front and the Township keeps denying our remodeling plans.  The alarm system isn't working and the lighting fixtures are blowing... one by one.  I am going to make this house into a beautiful home if it kills me.   I can hardly wait to light the fireplace this Christmas Eve...