This is no schoolgirl crush. It's not an infatuation or even an affair. It's a lifelong commitment. Through thick and thin till death do us part. It's who I am, and who I'll always be. Chocolate.
I realize the severity of my addiction. I've tried to give it up a few times but I always come back. My idea of foraging for food is peeling the tin foil from the individually wrapped pieces of Rolos. Exercise? Sustained and vigorous chewing of Tootsie Rolls. Dieting? A restriction on the amount of chocolate you eat each day.
I know there are other food groups. Their purpose is to keep you alive so you can eat more chocolate. Challenged in some way? There are sugar-free, nut free and dairy free chocolates. There is even religious chocolate; Kosher and GODiva. If chocolate was available in the Garden of Eden do you think Eve would have gone for the apple?
Chocolate has medicinal purposes. It calms the beast-like symptoms of PMS and can help heal a broken heart. Throughout history, chocolate has been there. What do you think Napoleon had hidden under his coat? A chocolate bar no doubt. When Marie Antoinette shouted, "Let them eat cake!", she meant chocolate cake. When Gloria Swanson said,"Alright Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close up", it was because she had just finished licking the last traces of a chocolate truffle from her fingertips.
There is no event or situation that isn't improved in some way by chocolate. Chocolate is for everybody, no matter what your age, sex, religion, location, nationality, or income. And it's totally legal and readily available.
It's an integral part of many holidays. What's an Easter basket without chocolate bunnies? A Christmas stocking without a chocolate Santa? What does every kid want when he goes trick or treating on Halloween? Chocolate candy. Don't even think about Valentine's Day without chocolate. What kind of factory did Willy Wonka have? You got it.
You probably got your first taste from your parents. Would your own mother give you something that wasn't good for you?
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